The First Realizations

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THAT YOU'RE NOT IN COLLEGE ANYMORE:



**You're waking up at 6 am instead of going to bed.



**Beers at lunch get you reprimanded.



**College sweat shirts are 'casual' instead of dress up.



**Your parents charge rent.



**The four food groups are no longer beer, pizza, chips and cereal.



**It's 'getting late when it's 9:30 p.m.



**Three words:  Student Loan Payments.



**You make thousands of dollars a year - and still can't afford that

dream Porsche.



**You start eyeing the Light Beer Section appreciatively.



**Pickup football games mean that at least one person will be in the

hospital by games end.



**THEN, discussing with your friends:  GPAs, spring break plans, and

tonsil hockey;



**NOW:  mutual funds, interest rates, and wedding plans.



**Sleeping on the couch is a no-no.



**Naps are no longer available between noon and 6 p.m.



**Sneakers are now 'weekend shoes'.



**Dinner and a movie - The whole date instead of the beginning of one.



**Pregnancy now brings thought of tax deductions instead of

coronaries.



**Jack and Cokes become Dewers on the Rocks.



**The only drugs you take are Tums and Tylenol.



**The weak single you hit in the intramural softball game is now

remembered as a Varsity dinger for the League Championship.



**You get your news from sources other than USA Today, ESPN

Sportscenter, and MTV News.



**Random hook-ups are no longer socially acceptable.



**You wear more ties in a week than you even owned while taking in

college.



**You find yourself reminiscing fondly of 2-hour Calculus exams.



**You empathize with the characters from 'Friends.'



**METABOLISM SLOWDOWN



**Wine appreciation expands beyond Boone's and Mad Dog.



**You actually eat breakfast foods at breakfast time.



**Grocery lists actually contain relatively healthy food.



**When drinking, you say at least once per night, 'I just can't put it

down the same as I used to.'



**Over 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer  is for real

work,  not video games.



**You're actually willing to pay a bit more to drink in a bar that's

not full  of '21-year-old kids.'



**Golf is beginning to seem a lot less silly.